I've made a difficult choice.
I think it's a good one though. I am weaning myself off of FB. I can't do it anymore. The tragedy that happened on Friday has deeply hurt my heart and I feel torn open each and every time I see a post about it. My daughters are the age of the children that were killed. I can't stand the thoughts. And because of my specific mental illnesses I can't get those thoughts out of my head once they are there. I obsess and obsess about them for hours at a time.
The same is true for posts about vomit. I can't handle those either. Innocently enough someone will post about a sick child or an illness of their own and I read it and then I panic for the rest of the day. I am losing time with my family due to the panic and I can not possibly in good conscience do that over social media.
So in order to strike a balance I am communicating with messages and sticking to my wall. Posting occasionally, but not reading the news feed. It's a hard habit to break, but it's worth it to me and to my family. I've tried before and have failed. I pray this time it's different.
Slightly off topic, I wrote a post here on Friday evening. I didn't share it on any media because I didn't feel it needed to be shared. It was just personal feelings I needed to get out. Read it if you like and don't if you don't!
I am busy tonight preparing my heart for dropping my daughters off at school tomorrow. It's an event I have been dreading since noon on Friday. However, I trust in God that His promises are good. I have prayed for the safety of my children and I know in my heart that He is in control no matter what. I am sure I am not alone in the anxiety that the morning will bring. So I am keeping all of you Mamas out there in my prayers tonight as well.
Hopefully the next post will be one of happy things. Garlands and tinsel. Cookies and hot cocoa. Joy and peace.
I think it's a good one though. I am weaning myself off of FB. I can't do it anymore. The tragedy that happened on Friday has deeply hurt my heart and I feel torn open each and every time I see a post about it. My daughters are the age of the children that were killed. I can't stand the thoughts. And because of my specific mental illnesses I can't get those thoughts out of my head once they are there. I obsess and obsess about them for hours at a time.
The same is true for posts about vomit. I can't handle those either. Innocently enough someone will post about a sick child or an illness of their own and I read it and then I panic for the rest of the day. I am losing time with my family due to the panic and I can not possibly in good conscience do that over social media.
So in order to strike a balance I am communicating with messages and sticking to my wall. Posting occasionally, but not reading the news feed. It's a hard habit to break, but it's worth it to me and to my family. I've tried before and have failed. I pray this time it's different.
Slightly off topic, I wrote a post here on Friday evening. I didn't share it on any media because I didn't feel it needed to be shared. It was just personal feelings I needed to get out. Read it if you like and don't if you don't!
I am busy tonight preparing my heart for dropping my daughters off at school tomorrow. It's an event I have been dreading since noon on Friday. However, I trust in God that His promises are good. I have prayed for the safety of my children and I know in my heart that He is in control no matter what. I am sure I am not alone in the anxiety that the morning will bring. So I am keeping all of you Mamas out there in my prayers tonight as well.
Hopefully the next post will be one of happy things. Garlands and tinsel. Cookies and hot cocoa. Joy and peace.
 |
| My happy faced girls. Bailey, 5, and Kyra, 7 |
Yes. This.
ReplyDeleteI had my husband change my password last night. Not only are the sickness posts making me want to never leave my house, but I can't handle the self centered whining.
Good for you. If you can do it, I can :)
How are you doing with it? What have you used to fill up your time and keep your hands busy? I am finding it very similar to quitting cigarettes. :)
Delete