Unfiltered

This stinks. I'm so tired. I have been in this state of high anxiety for well over a week now and I can't shake it. I am so full of anger and bitterness today it is hard to even be near myself.

I know that there is a purpose for everything under Heaven, I just can't see it right now. Praying and waiting is about one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Panic has kept me from some very happy and important things this week and last. It has stolen the joy from the time I have spent with my children. It is slowly but surely stealing all of the sanity I have left.

I am low. Very low. My faith is unwavering thank God, I know that it is Him holding on to me, because I have no grip left.

Tomorrow morning I will go to church and hear the best band ever Brothers McClurg.  I am hoping that by being in the company of fellow believers and worshiping along side my Brothers and Sisters in Christ that I will be able to renew my spirit and gain the strength I need to carry on with these burdens on my shoulders.

I have no happy ending or cute way to sum things up today. I am just raw, scared, angry, and frustrated. I will say this, I serve an awesome God. One of miracles. One who is mighty to save. That is the one I am calling on tonight. Come Lord Jesus to these places where I am broken and save me.