Anger

There is a deep dark secret hiding among young Moms. It's something that no one wants to fess up to and get out in the open. They fear once they do that they will be judged and looked down on. I know this because I experience it, often. It's anger.

Anger toward your kids, frustration over your life (or lack there of), and just plain disillusionment with being a Mom. It can take on some ugly faces if it is left to hide out in the dark. It can manifest into ways that hurt you and your kids and provide you with a never ending flow of guilt, self-condemnation, and pain.

There is good news right from the start, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. You are not the only Mom on this Earth who is feeling angry and acting out of that anger. If you are struggling with this then you have already probably realized that there is a problem here. Now you can take the steps to deal with and turn that anger over to God.

The reason that it's not talked about as freely as say, PPD, is that it is something that you feel guilty over. It is something that is not as "acceptable" as say trouble with potty training. Yet I am willing to bet just as many Moms are experiencing it. There is a fear of admitting the truth. Fear of having your children taken away, fear of being looked down on, fear of admitting failure. Here's the deal though, if you are willing to face those fears and admit your truth you can work with other Moms like you and support each other through a REAL transformation out of this poisonous cycle.

Being angry isn't something to be ashamed of. It is something that happens, just like PPD or potty training issues. The important part is that you understand that it isn't healthy for you or your kids and work on a change. That's what I am doing.

I have an anger problem. I yell WAY more than I should. I lose my temper altogether too often. I am a short fused, red faced maniac. I don't want to be this way. I wasn't this way before I had my children and I want to make a change back to myself. I want to laugh with my kids and be a Mommy to be proud of. I want to be a nurturer, instead of someone who cuts down with sarcastic barbs. I want to be someone my kids can come to without fear of judgement. I want to be full of grace and mercy for my kids instead of a yelling lunatic.

So here is what I am doing about it. First of all I brought my dark secret out into the light and am asking for help from anyone who has been there or is there now who would like to build a support system. I picked up a fantastic book called, "She's Gonna Blow!" by Julie Ann Barnhill. It is real and practical advice from her personal experience and it is amazing. And last, but not least I am praying for help.

I know this is a taboo thing. I would never physically harm my children, but I know that my anger is doing damage. I know that it is time for a change. If you are there too, would you join me?